This last week was good, it is funny that everyone assumed we were catholic yesterday when we said merry christmas. The members had a really good christmas party, and we had quite a few of potential investigators and investigators there. Anton is one of them and he came to chruch yesterday.
NO transfer still, so I am still District leader up here in Sumy. We have had a few changes to missionary schedule that will allow me to sleep more, so I am all for it!
SOrry it is a short letter this week, but I figure youll all be too tired to read it anyway!
LOVE YOU ALL!
Hey bud!
Skyping was so great! I can't believe how much I miss you and how much you have changed. You have a man face now;). I'm so proud of you. You looked happy and great.
OK FIRST of all...I AM SOOO SORRY! For how we responded about no transfer. I didn't even think about the fact that he could hear us. I tried to cover with why I was shocked because of the Facebook post I saw. Which was true. I went back and looked at it and it was actually that Sister Vanbuskirk had posted a pic of EV and tagged it as Sumy, but it was the pic in front of the tree in Kharkiv. All she wrote was "its Kharkiv" and with the fact that she saw you guys I assumed it was his transfer. So sorry about that awkwardness and I hope I covered it up.
But the truth is my response was complete shock because I CAN'T BELIEVE that you guys didn't get split up!!!!! And then we couldn't even talk about it, so I just wish I could figure out how you are feeling about it! I have been a little upset about it all day...maybe more than a little. It is so hard for me when you have problems and I can't fix them. I'm sure that is part of my learning process...but it's terrible! I need full details this email about how your feeling about it. Will you survive? ETC. I will come back to this at the end of the email with all the info I want.
It was really great to see you and talked to you though. It's the best Christmas present I could get! It was nice to do it in the morning, because I didn't have to wait for it...but then I was sad because it was too short and over too soon. It felt like 10 mins maybe, and I feel like we got shorted on our last 5 mins, which made me sad. I wanted to do a family prayer at the end and a picture but it got to crazy with EV skyping too.
Our week..
Mainly we just did Christmas stuff all week. The kids finished up with school. Kaestli was sick all week with a cold and ear infections. Cam got sick Friday night and has been REALLY sick. He has had a fever and is pitiful. He had to miss the Christmas Eve party and I just quarantined him for the Christmas day party. He has been up all night for 2 nights now, and I am exhausted...cause I have been up with him.
Me and my sisters started a new tradition of a Christmas Bake. We got together on the 23rd and baked a bunch of things we haven't ever done before. It was so much fun. Even Traci joined in and made peanut butter squares...(now you're craving peanut butter squares;).
The Martineau party was good. Carly is having her baby boy next month. Abby and Kimball graduate BYU next semester. Everyone else is about the same.
We got the tboys today around 2 and I think they are staying for a couple days. They are all doing good. Ethan has a serious girlfriend that makes us a little nervous. He says she is a big supporter and pushing him for a mission, but this is the most serious he has ever been. I honestly think that HE THINKS he will marry her...but she does seem nice. We just hope he doesn't get into trouble with her.
Leigh Sirrine got engaged last week!!!! She said she is getting married in August and said you should know the guy. He is in the pic and was on the swim team with you guys. She did say he was kind of a jerk in HS but he is nice now.
Ok...back to the issues that need to be discussed
1-Have you told the MP how bad things are with EV??? You NEED too!!! Be honest with him.
2-How bad is it really? Like give me a % of how bad vs how good things are. Give separate % for companionship, 4 some group dynamics, being in Sumy, etc. Also a % of how effective this companionship has been in the work compared to past companionships.
3-Will you be able to last another 6 weeks with him?
4-Do you think he will ask for an emergency transfer like he threatened?
5-Will you ask for an emergency transfer?
6-Could you just say to the MP that you are ready for a change and things are not working out with him any longer? Or even tell him that its hindering the work being with him. I mean it's been since Sept...that is forever!
7-How are you feeling about the no change? Are you mad, upset, resigned to it, frustrated, fine, happy??? How are you handling it?
8-Did the MP tell you why he did not transfer you guys? Again does he know how bad it is? You had an interview with him this week right? What did you talk about, give me full details please. I feel like if you had told him how bad it was he would have made a change. Help me understand. What did he say about the situation, what advice did he give you?
9-Are you REALLY staying happy and positive or are you just saying that for me?
10- Final question....do you want me to email Sister Sullivan or President and tell them they really need to make a change? Cause I will if you want me too.
Please read and answer all of those. I miss you like crazy and am so excited that we only have 7 months and 10 days before our hug. I can't wait!
4.5 months to Skype again! I'm hoping this year flies by! I am so ready for you to come back. We literally miss everything about you. Kaestli was totally crying today talking to you. She wants you back so much. We all love you and miss you. Thanks for the package and the nesting dolls. We love them.
You're the best. Hang in there and keep working hard. Pray for understanding and that you will be able to help EV learn what ever he needs to learn for you, and you from him. I just still can't believe it didn't get changed. I'm sorry.
I love you so much!!!!!! Thanks for being awesome!
Love
Mom
Oh yeah, Leigh HATED that guy, I think it is so funny that they are together. She probably had to tell him off like every day. I havent told him so deep, but he seems to know, he said that Elder Vanbuskirk knows that at least 90 percent of the problem is him. Honestly I am pretty sure that he would hate me if I was just a potatoe at this point. He hates that he has been junior companion for so long. He hates that I "correct" him all the time, but he just does stupid things that would get us yelled at real good, which is worse for me since I know what they are saying to us. He can probably speak Russian just as well as Cam spoke english when he was 3. 10-20 percent of what he says is understandable, the rest is just words that he has made up. Honestly, the problem is that I am his first companion that is definitively better than him. He cannot handle it. He often attacks me, whenever I have any opinion. I knew that he had had hard companions that insulted him for no reason, and I promised him I wouldnt do that when we became companions, but honestly, half of the insults wouldnt be insults, they would just be truths.
90 percent of everything is good. I could last another 7 months with this guy, it wouldnt even be hard. It is literally all his problem. I dont care what he thinks of me, and I think that I will start "Correcting" every single little mistake, if he cant take it that is his problem, because I dont care if he likes me anymore, I dont care about being his friend, I would love to, but I am done changing, he is going to have to change and come to my level.
It is comparably the same to effectiveness in the work as past companionships.
NO I will not ask for an ET. Maybe God wants me to be his companion for so long so nothing my wife does will ever bother me.
Yeah I have told him that the Companionship has been rough, I try to keep him updated without making EV sound like a terrible person. I am fine with no change, I am starting to find it funny when he is upset. He hasnt learned Russian yet becasue he doesnt actually want to. He says he wants to, but when it actually comes to doing it he loses determination. Then He goes into Grumpy EV mode. Elder Vanbuskirk is a normal person until he is in Grumpy EV mode. It happens at least once a week, and sometimes it lasts a whole week.
As far as with the interview, I talkeda bout a lot of important stuff, said that the companion ship was rough, and he responded that he was aware. Elder Vanbuskirk at least apologizes for the big things, so I dont report those to president, I expect him(EV) to ask for an ET in about 2 weeks.
Yes I am really happy and Positive. ELder Vanbuskirk is not.
No you dont need to ask for a change. What will be will be, and its only another 6 weeks, not the end of the world.
So to sum it up: I do wish I had a new comp, but its not the end of the world. Elder Vanbuskirk creates his own problems, the only person who feels contention, is him. I can feel that he is feeling it, but I dont know waht it is about. IT takes two to fight, and it bothers him that I dont respond aggressively like he does. I kind of vent to you in these letters so remember that what your reading is stuff I have already gotten over. HE does have some good qualities, like sometimes he will make dinner, or something like that.
MOm I love you so much! You have nothing to worry about, please dont worry about the situation, it will be ok! You are the best and it was so good to see you last night and it really helped. That time will definitely help me to work more effectively. MOst of my dreams have all of you in them and they seem to always end with us going to lake powell. LOVE YOU!
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